Have you ever wondered how hard it is to stay home with your kids all day? Spend time pondering why your stay at home wife can’t manage to maintain a meticulous home? Do you know how badly that spouse of yours wants to dump the kids off on you and have just 20 minutes of time to themselves? Well I’m here to let you know. This is how most of my days are spent, start to finish. I’m about to take you on a trip through what I do with my son all day and how I expect to do it with the next one.
8:00 AM: All is peaceful, I’m asleep in bed with the dogs, my wife has gone to work…
8:01 AM: “MOMMY!” I hear shouted straight into my ear. It’s time to wake up again. I roll out of bed groggy from the short night of sleep I’ve gotten. I attempt to feed him breakfast but he doesn’t want to eat anything. We go to the TV and watch some sort of YouTube show teaching colors, shapes, numbers…whatever.
9:00 AM: I try again to feed him and he is still persistent. He decides he wants to go downstairs(where the other half of the ridiculous pile of toys are.) So we go downstairs for an hour and a half and play.
10:30 AM: I try to feed him YET AGAIN. and he still wants nothing, except nope, he’s changed his mind and he’d like a Popsicle. by this point I’m pretty exhausted just from chasing him for the last hour or two so I usually give in. while he eats the Popsicle I have to maintain constant supervision over him lest the couch get melting Popsicle on it(Usually somehow I still fail at this) and proceed to attempt a cleanup on aisle Living Room.
11:00 AM: I try to feed him lunch since he skipped breakfast. He takes another Popsicle. Repeat last 30 minutes
11:30 AM: We watch a kids movie, usually Cars or Toy Story. I’m not allowed to leave his side while this movie is on, even to use the restroom.
1:00 PM: I try to feed him again. Usually at this point I can succeed in getting him to eat pretzels or mac n cheese.
1:30 PM: Get dragged around the house by him to play with Cars, Puzzles, Drawing, etc. for another 2 hours.
3:30 PM: The day can go either of two ways at this point. Either A: He naps now until my wife gets home from work. or B: He’s Raging because he’s tired and we end up watching another movie or some educational YouTube.
4:00-5:00 PM: He’s finally fallen unconscious from exhaustion during the movie, conveniently right before my wife gets home.
5:00 PM: I scramble to do dishes, laundry, clean up toys, wipe floors and spills, put food away and any other cleaning before my wife gets home. Oh and clean too.
5:30 PM: I have inevitably failed at finishing these tasks and my wife has returned from work asking why I have done nothing all day.
6:00 PM: If I finished dinner before she got home she’s just sitting down to eat it and reminding me of my failures during the day. If I decided to do dishes or another task instead of cooking she’ll be angry that she hasn’t eaten yet.
6:00-6:30 PM: If I’m lucky I have persuaded her to allow me 20 minutes to shower.
7:00 PM: Give my kid an hour long bath. Ensure he does not drown.
8:00 PM: Family TV time, I try to catch up on the chores that I haven’t finished yet before the night ends. Usually forgetting one in the process.
9:00 PM: Up until recently I would take my kid into the room and put him to bed. Thank God my wife has taken on that responsibility recently so I have time to finish the chores.
10:00 PM: My kid and wife have both gone to bed and I can get on here to check on the site and handle any other adult computer time tasks I have to do.
11:00 PM: Stream live on Twitch playing games for viewers
12:00 AM: Hopefully take a break to switch the laundry I most likely forgot about.
12:00-3:00 AM: Finish streaming and finally get ready for bed.
3:15 AM: In bed with headphones on listening to ASMR until I pass out
8:01 AM: Repeat.
That my friends is my full, nonstop day. Now I know what you’re going to say “It’s easy to walk away from your kid for a few minutes to do dishes or vacuum or start a load of laundry” But I just can’t, I feel so bad when he’s asking for my attention. There are times in the evening when he calls for me that I try to ignore it since it’s happened the entire day. But I usually end up getting in trouble by my wife for that. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed the other side of the story, From a Man’s perspective.
Next week: Why I think ECFE is a waste of your kids’ time, and more importantly your time too.